Self-care, but make it for the soul.

Hello readers!

I find myself with inspiration to write and post on my little online space again - so here we are! I can't promise to give consistent content, because although I can talk for England, it's not always so easy to put it into something people want to read. But, the time has come again to put something out there! It comes after my big sister turned 30 last week, and we celebrated with a party (of course), then a girly trip to the Cotswolds. It was divine. 48 hours of laughter. This got me thinking about just how important girl time is.

I read Claudia Winkleman's book earlier this year, and I couldn't put it down. I read it in half a day - I really do recommend it if you want to lose 6 hours chuckling to yourself and thinking “yep, I do that too!”. Obviously, she's brilliant, we know this, but she wrote a chapter on having girlfriends, and why as a woman having female friends around you is so important. I couldn't have agreed more reading it, and every time I have quality girl time, it reminds me of why it resonated with me so much.

I spent the weekend with 3 women, and honestly, we all came home feeling a million dollars. Now yes, that could have had something to do with the cocktails and shopping, but actually, I believe it was the time we spent together. To be honest, I could sit in a Costa for hours and feel refreshed if I was sat opposite a friend that just made that little bit of me shine brighter. The point is, spending time with your girlfriends, in my opinion, is better than any spa treatments out there.

There is something so special about women being able to relate to eachother, rely on eachother, reach out to eachother. No matter how much we say we are independent, having a mate to reach out to is such a lifeline. Whether you want to call them up and sob down the phone, rant until they snap you out of it, chat to them as you walk home, or even FaceTime them to show some them new shoes... it's a form of self-care. It stops us from really losing our shit on a daily basis.

I also believe we choose our friends so perfectly without even really considering it. We all go to different friends for different reasons, and all of which keep our heads above water. If I've locked myself out, I know who I'd be calling to help me out at the drop of a hat. If I want to go out last minute and end up somewhere completely random, I have the perfect friend for that. We each do this subconsciously, to be honest! There are some things we just know only that one friend would appreciate, or that one problem we know would only be solved by this certain person.

This being said, I have also chosen to place myself surrounded by women I look up to, too. Again, this is my way of trying to be the best I can be - like choosing to work out (a rare occurance), or reading self-help books. I choose to surround myself with friends I want to be more like. Yes, the friend who is free at 3am for cocktails might be great fun, but I will always need the friend who tells me when I'm being stupid. These are the best type of friends, deep down. They keep you sane and from doing things 35 year old you would wish you just hadn't done. This friend might not always be your partner in crime, but they would bail you out of prison if you ever got there. We owe a lot to this friend, really. Sometimes self-care is about taking that (sometimes painfully) honest friend's advice.

Regardless of which friend you feel the need to call upon, just make sure you do. Some people like meditating, some people find release at the gym, but me, I feel a weight lifted after spending an hour with just one of those women in my life. That, to me, is looking after myself.

Your girlfriends are your sisterhood. Your biggest fans, and perhaps, your biggest critics. And you love them for it.

Because yeah, relationships can be good for the heart, but girlfriends are good for the soul.

Speak soon,

Em x